Friday, April 11, 2014

Some things that happened

They accidentally traveled four days forward in time due to an unfavorable astrological configuration, which caused their doppelgangers to be forced down from the Primal Void to resolve the paradox.  I was going to have the doppelgangers compete with them in everything they did, but they trapped their doppelgangers in the palace kitchen by having the court wizard send out messengers going, "Oh wow! I figured out how to hatch the egg of the Unmonkey! Where are you?? You should come right away!"

They interrogated Nick's doppelganger's trapped soul and learned about the ongoing war between the seven mighty stars of the Primal Void, which I had written a lengthy and detailed write-up about maybe a year ago, but which I lost in the meantime.  "Umm uhh uhhmmm uh" I said.  "Nate can you just say we know this stuff and we can move on?"  "Yes," I said.  "Okay," they said, and wrote it down on their sheets. "Knowledge.. of the ... what is it?" "Primal Void."  "The Primal... Void..."

They crushed a white elf necromancer with the giant black egg of the ancient unmonkey god Oth Omogg.  They rolled the egg over the necromancer very slowly and laughed while he died.

The turned the mithril bars they found in the secret underground church of Izorides, Goddess of Witches, which was guarded by Velrathi the 1374th God of Wind, into arms and armor.  Good for them.

They procured a guide book for creating a brass golem (to be randomly generated from Carcosa), but I think they've forgot about it.

Thomson rigged his electric generator into a backpack, bought fancy copper wire, and specially rigged up a handful of crossbow bolts to hook into the wire and the generator.  He taught his trained monkey "Monkey B. Goode" how to turn the crank on command.  Here are some people Thomson's tased: a cannibal ape; Hocca Orgemyth, a filthy man in thrall to manscorpions pretending to be a priest of St. Coreme.

They met Grim, an 11-year-old child prostitute sorceress, who is also Nick's girlfriend Meela.  Some mummies were climbing up out of some coffins hanging off a cliffside, and she kicked one off.  When I asked them how they planned to evade the three-headed giant ape god in the forest, she suggested they move "laterally" to the road.  In her words, she plans to only cast dirty, sneaky spells.

Here's a picture she drew of Nick's character Dirtface:

He has a red mallet that when it hits a guy, there's a 30% chance it makes a GONG sound and they phase out of existence for a round, and he has a cloak made from the hides of the Star Hounds that guarded the throneroom of the Damnation Prophet.

What else

They traveled south of Olomoc into the Goblin Wastes.  Hex crawling is made easy with:

1. a hex-map that happens to correspond in part to a map of the Goblin Wastes that I'd already drawn
2. the text-mechanics site to easily generate a list of all the numbers of the hexes, even though they weren't sequential
3. Logan's Choose Your Own Generator website to create a hex generator
4. The 26ish generators I labored over without knowing for sure if they'd actually end up being useful

So they crawled through the Goblin Wastes, evaded the three-headed ape god "Throol Josh," the evil druids riding him, and his army of cannibal apes; and hung out with a knight of Duke Oppelhopf mounted on a snail who told them about the manscorpions infesting the Shrine of St. Coreme, and also about a purple orc warlock in a spiked iron crown marauding the town of Beldr Tuum to the east, and also about the kingdom of King Roderick and Queen Ang to the south which borders on the domain of Urizen, Lord of Change, whose corpse blights the landscape near the Academy of Thaumaturgica Delirium.

Finally finally they made it to the Shrine of St. Coreme, who as reward for killing some witches a long time ago, promised to mend their wounds and grant them a weapon of great power if ever they visited her shrine.

Me: "There's a broad, shallow lake filled with dead tree trunks, fed by two streams.  At the far end of the lake a black pyramid rises from the water, and atop the pyramid is a black obelisk."

Them: "This shrine is a lot more metal than I thought it was going to be."

Cool.  They slew the false priest and kneeled before the likeness of St. Coreme, who was crucified upside down on a cross for her heresy against Azhardhul, the Blake Drake.  She opened her marble eyes and the heavens parted and she peeled her withered hand away from the cross and touched them on their foreheads, and all their ills were cured: the blue gorillas that were living in their dreams leapt from their minds; the mind of Skoraz the Wizard flew screaming from Nick's psyche; Jeff's mummy rotted bite closed up; and Thomson's false body, which he accidentally inhabited after misfiring a wand at the Damnation Prophet months and months ago, and which was tall, grim, ugly, and composed of poisonous snakes, that body melted off of him like wax, and exposed good old scrawny Sad Ed.

Everyone high fived.  Good game.  This game is a good game.

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